GETTING MARRIED? PLAN TOGETHER – Why Use an Estate Planning Attorney to Prepare a Prenuptial Agreement
People contemplating marriage often consider the advisability of a prenuptial agreement, particularly in a second marriage. What difference does it make if you go to a divorce attorney to prepare the prenup or seek the advice of an estate planning lawyer? Plenty! Let me share a recent story with you that comes from my work as a Jacksonville, Florida estate planning lawyer.
A client came to me after being told by her fiance’ that she would have to sign a prenuptial agreement prepared by “his” attorney. This was less than two (2) weeks prior to the scheduled wedding ceremony. She was assured by her fiance’ that she was being asked to sign a “standard” prenup. However, its terms sought to have the soon-to-be wife waive every legal right she conceivably could have acquired as a result of the marriage and also stated that the parties’ assets and funds would at all times be kept separate during the marriage. As you might suspect, my client was quite upset and felt blind-sided by this request. She pushed back by refusing to sign the agreement and presented a counterproposal for, perhaps, more than she otherwise would be legally entitled. This upset the prospective husband. Rocky negotiations ensued and the wedding was postponed.
What is the moral of this story? Tone and context is as important as content. By going to a divorce attorney to prepare the prenup, it was presented in a threatening manner. The prospective husband presented it to the prospective wife as a precondition to the marriage from “my attorney”. This caused bitter feelings and led to angry negotiations. Contrast this scene to the couple instead sitting down with an estate planning attorney to discuss how “we” want “our” financial arrangements during the marriage (and beyond) to unfold. The estate planning lawyer will counsel and provide options to this couple for what “we” want to accomplish; protection of children from a prior marriage, their family issues, asset protection, etc. and the role that a prenuptial agreement will play in their overall estate plan. The parties thus are able to begin their marriage discussing difficult financial and legal issues together in a supportive environment, instead of apart in an adversarial one.
The choice of an attorney, including the type of attorney, to prepare a prenuptial agreement is an important one. If you or one of your friends are contemplating taking this step, please carefully consider the different outcomes that may result from this decision. Plan together, for the journey of marriage…
